Get What You Want or Get What You Need?

Everyone likes to feel confident and on top of stuff. Staying in your comfort zone can have you feel confident all the time. But isn’t it the REALLY confident people who are willing to get uncomfortable? Doesn’t it take resilience and aplomb to be willing to fail, look dumb or feel awkward?

Sometimes when you roll with what life offers you, you get what you need in order to grow, but it’s not what you had wanted. You may have been aiming for something a little more comfy.

This has 2 implications with food.

One is this: perhaps you are stretching yourself professionally, emotionally or sexually and the unfamiliar territory inspires a ravenous craving for comfort food. There’s no right or wrong about it. It’s just an invitation to remain conscious when you least want to. Food is a sure fire way we can comfort ourselves when we are being brave enough to grow. Just staying present is doing the work.

The other is this: When people come into my office, they have an idea of why they’d like to achieve. Sometimes that’s not actually what happens. Sometimes they want to learn exactly what to eat, when what they need is to learn to be playful and compassionate with food. Sometimes they want to lose weight when what they need is to overhaul the status quo in their intimate relationship. Sometimes they want to fine tune their physical machine and what happens is they find that their heart lights on fire and their deeper purpose now demands their attention.

If there is a foundation of trust in “the universe”, or God or even just your own personal process of unfolding, you may be more likely to yield to the cues that are coming at you.

Is it time that the old-fashioned definition of “strong” (stoic, stable, unyielding and constant) give way to a new definition of strong that is flexible, vulnerable and receptive to the changing truth of each moment?

Because people with the latter definition of strong are the ones who grow regularly as human beings and are therefore more able to offer their authentic gifts to the world more often.

With that second definition of strong comes a willingness to get what you need even if it’s not what you wanted. That sometimes comes in the form of a dietary change you’re not psyched about making.

But once you make that change, your flexible-type strength increases exponentially. Your brittle recalcitrance to change can soften and you can open up to a wisdom that is greater than yourself.

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